BIRTH OF A CHILD:
The sixth day of a child’s birth is celebrated as ‘CHHATHI’. On that day cut six cotton thread, dip it in tumeric water and tie it to the neck, waist, hands and legs. In a thali/dish take a coconut, red ink pen, blank page, silverwaist band (Kandora) / Payal, white kurta, cap (draw a swastik on the clothes) and a lamp, put it under the bed of the mother, covering it with a basket and folding hands, pray that the “Vidhata may please write a good destiny for the child”.
On the eleventh day, the mother must bath from head, in a plate take soaked Nachni (cereal), wet vermillion turmeric, 11 betel leaves, betel nuts-coins. Early morning while praying to Sun God, the coconut of the sixth day must be kept on a bronze kalash, garlanded and light a lamp. Then do tikka of vermillion and turmeric. On five betel leaves put betel nuts, beans, Nachni and bow down, then the kernel of the coconut is eaten by the mother as “Prasad” Also perform pooja on the threshold of the house as well as bathroom. A married lady must give the mother wheat, coconut and money and then she should give as a good gesture, the above things to the lady who comes to do massage.
Later on, every ‘kul’ has a different rituals about the first haircut of the child which may be adhered to.
- BRIDE SIDE: Decorate a tray with new coconut, five fruits, three or five sweet packets, one garland/bouquet. An envelope with token money in a cone, cubes of sugar / patasha may be kept.
- GROOM SIDE: Put all the above things and one flower head gear (Veini), saree, blouse, peticot, bangles, Tikka’ (Bindi) in the tray. Ring ceremony is optional or else above things are exchanged and both parties do “Tikka”.
First of all, wedding card is to be put up to the Almighty God. When the wedding cards are brought, women have to put ‘Kurnkum’ rice’ on it. For Ritual of “Ghan-Pithi”, following things are to be kept ready. 1) New Supadu, 2) 1.250 kg Bhat as also nine raw soparis (betelnuts), betel leaves dry dates - coins. All these things have to be kept in the new supada. Generally depending upon one’s own customs, the rituals of “ Ghan-Pithi” is carried out before three days or five days of the marriage date. The things kept in the supada is to be struck with a sambela (a special wooden rod). On the same day, Haldi ceremony is performed. It has to be performed by four married women. Two mango leaves have to be immersed in turmeric and oil, then crossing hands (Right hand up and left hand below), it has to be started first by applying on legs, and while applying pithi on cheek, both hands has to be open. This is to be done for three times each day by all four women. Besides the bride/ bridegroom, a young girl aged upto 10 years have to be seated and she has to be given coconut, floral garland and money. After this ceremony jaggery and ghee have to be eaten by all present.
- PREPARATION FOR BRIDE FAMILY: To install Kuldevi, along with a 3 big, medium and small (altogether 9) pots, 6 Kodias (mudlamps) have to be brought. Inside these things following things have to be kept. 1) Betel leaves, 2) Betel nuts, 3) Dried turmeric, 4) Patasha, 5) Puris, 6) Drydates, 7) Papad, 8) Gol Papadi all numbering Eighteen. All those things had to be divided into two parts and to be, filled in two earthen pots. In the third pot eleven coins have to be inserted. On those pots other medium pots have to be kept and in the middle one with water, has to be kept. In the pot of Kshetrapal, 1kg rice, tur dal, betel nuts, leaves, dry dates Rupees Twenty-five and coconut has to be put and to be given to the bride when she leaves.
- PREPARATION FOR GROOM’S FAMILY: To install Kuldevi, 3 big and 3 small earthen pots and four big kodias (mud lamps) have be brought. Things mentioned above for bride’s family has to be kept in those pots in the same manner. The pot of the “Kshetrapal” has to be taken to Temple on the day after marriage.
- KANYADAAN: Bride’s family has to bring garlands and Antarpat (A piece of cloth held between the bride and bridegroom). For Kayandaan Silver cow, Kankavati, Divi, German -Silver Thali, Copper Loto, Brass Vati have to be brought. In the thali 1.250kg Wheat, Rice, Dry fruits in the loto, Jaggery-Ghee in vati, kumkum and money is to be put in each and every Kumkum vatis.
SHRIMANT CEREMONY (KHOLO BHARVO)
Initially start with Shree Ganesh Pooja, then prepare two thalis one for pregnant lady and another for the lady who will be performing pooja.
Keep 1.250kg Rice, Betel leaves, Betelnuts, Dry dates Apricot Kamarkakdi, Almond, Zardalu, Cashew, Elaichi, Cloves, One Bijoru and coconut.
Keep all the above ingredients in a pot, place a coconut on top of it and give it in hand.
Note: Kindly perform pooja a prayer as per your own Kuldevi rituals chant, “Kuldevi kindly protect our family”.
REACHING THE FINAL ABODE AT THE FEETS OF GOD.
- After the declaration by a doctor, lay the dead body with head towards the north.
- Bathe the body, put on the new clothes, mix wheat flour with ghee and sugar and make a laddoo, keep it on mud lamp. Light a lamp with a sleeping wick, put it near the head (In case of a Suhagan, she should be made to wear the suhagan things).
- Furneral Procession items: 2 long bamboo sticks, 12 nos small sticks, 2 mud pots (1 big - 1 small), 3rd small mud pot, if you want to keep the ashes. 1 mud lamp, 3 metre white cloth, 1 Coconut, Abil, gulal, Kanku, Cotton, Match box, ghee, nadachadi, jute rope, sutli, 2 betel leaves, 2 betel nut, a woollen shawl for man, a Saree for a lady, tuvar dalt, rice (Khichadi), a garland each of tulsi flower and sandalwood, a Jali made out of flower, sandal wood sticks, rose / flower petals.
- Pole bearers: Traditionally in our Community, in case of male 4 persons of the Family lift up the body, in case of female 3 persons of the husband’s family and one from the lady’s maternal side lift the body.
- Light the cow dung cake and fill it in the small mud pot to be taken by the 5th person ahead of the procession to the cemetery, near the gate after taking rest (Viasamo) keeping betel leaf, betel nut and little khichadi with coins, the body is taken to funeral pyre. With the head first, apply ghee on the body, put all sandalwood on it, arrange the wood and the family member to give fire, chanting God’s name has to go 4 round backwards. Stand near the head with feet apart, throw it, torches the first fire to the body and lights the fire.
- Later on, in the end the big pot is filled with water, on top of it a lamp is lighted, keeping betel leaf, betel nut and khichadi, and through feet apart, standing backward, make a hole in the mud pot so that the water starts coming out, a symbolic gesture to cool the funeral pyre.
- Those who want to keep the ashes, take a little of it pour milk on it and stores it in the 3rd pot keeping it in the cemetery itself.
Note: Before the actual funeral procession, somebody must go to the cemetery and make necessary preparation and arrangements to save time.
Earlier the daughter’s son (Dohitra) would give milk to the dead body, instead now people prefer offering grass to the cow later on.
- Utthamna should be avoided and a day should be communicated so that near and dear one’s can come one evening after 4.30 pm to express their condolence.
- Old Traditions of offering food and remembrances in the form of utensils and articles may please be discontinued as it saves time and we must go according to the changing times.
- The rituals after death may also be simplified / reduced as much as possible and something constructive should be done.